Robby ain't feeling so well. Please pray he will revive over night. He's not purring. Thank you.

At the Doggy Ice Cream Social there were dozens of dogs of every description, exactly like Go, Dog, Go! by Dr. Seuss. It was hysterical. Getting there so late, there was no doggy ice cream left, so Jazzi got an ice cream cone shaped cookie, painted in beautiful ice cream colored icing. I got a little cup of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. Robby got the new bed, it is this thing with a drawstring, so it can arrange to different sizes as he grows. The outside is a fancy black and white raised design (pretty extreme for me) and the inside is black. So, I set it by the spot Robby likes on the down comforter, which is, unfortunately, on the floor. The next thing I know, Robby is in the new bed. So my little theory worked superbly. Because Robby is black and the bed is black, it's hard to determine whether he is in there.

Anyway, the ice cream social was a sounding success.

Umm...I found out today I'm going to be having a guest for 10 weeks, starting in about a month. I'm in kind of a state of shock, to be perfectly honest, so catch you all later.

I am very worried about Robby.

KEM

Hello, hello, hello. Bringing you good cheer today.

Found an upscale pet shop. Oh brother. You can't believe the stuff in there. Like a micro suede harness for dogs. It's brilliant, the dog steps into it with his two front paws, then it fastens near the tummy. Nothing around the neck. It's the softest thing ever, feels like nothing. Rhinestones, just a couple of them, decorate it. All this can be yours for a shabby $59.00.

I think from now on my family and friends will be getting slick pet items for gifts. We humans certainly don't need another thing, so I'm buying for the pets from now on. Unless, of course, you don't have a pet.

At Target I found a bird toy, similar to those ratty little mice that disintegrated before my and Robby's eyes last night, the ones by Hartz. Hartz, are you listening? And this bird chirps if you pat (step on him) him just right. Which Jazzi is now fascinated by. YEAH, a toy Jazzi likes. Jazzi is MOST particular about her toys. She mainly loves her vinyl carrot (we are on Vinyl Carrot Number Two now), her Shake-It-Baby Bear that rattles and the empty plastic water bottles, she loves to chew off the caps, I think I've told you. I want to enter her in a talent contest. Robby loves the chirpy bird, too. Chirpy bird has brought my two pets together. I also bought three little mice that looked like they won't be losing all their bodily parts in a heartbeat.

The owner of the shop was so helpful. I was ready to buy a perfect bed for Robby (so he won't sleep on my down comforter) and then she said, Everything will be on sale tomorrow, 15% off, during the ice cream social. Hmm, now I have to go if for nothing else to see what a Dog Ice Cream Social is. It's only a three hour sale, and bless the lady, it doesn't start at 8 AM. It starts at 11. I will be there at 1:50.

Robby did it again. I was sleeping in the morning (since I stay up all night), and I hear the teensy meow. I raise my weary head to peer over the bed, and there he is, sitting there (animals are SO cute when they sit on all fours) looking up at me. I want to squeeze him to pieces. So he came up on the bed and we had a luscious nap and I woke up feeling better than I had in a long time. That's what cozy kitty love will do for ya.

AND, I do believe I recalled what the vet said about Robby. She said, He has such a tiny nose, and it's semi-outlined in black. It is. It's got like a black perforated line around the pink on the tip of the nose. I would have thought I would have remembered any mention of a petite nose, since I am a fan of cute little noses. This nose unites so exquisitely with his velvety little ears and wittle bunny wabbit feet.

Okay, not trying to make anyone sick here. Maybe next week I will force myself to write the stories I've been meaning to and have even told you I would. Oh, though, if you could just see and hold wittle Robby. My heart is a pool of sap.

Sappy KEM

Another day in Kitty Land.

At the vet, Robby made quite a splash. Oooohs and Aaaahs abounded. The greeter said, Oh look at the smudges on his face (that's one way to put it, I call them freckles). One tech said Robby was quite the stud. And cuddly, too. Then she showed him to another tech who said, This has made my day, he's so cute. The vet said he was unusual, I forget exactly what she said because I failed to register it in my brain. Can't stand it when that happens.

But Robby checked out okay except for Upper Respiratory Infection, symptoms being the dainty sneezing and soupy eyes and lethargy. Now he has to have 2 meds twice a day and he really does not appreciate a medicine dropper being jammed down his throat.

At the grocery store I bought a pack of Hartz toy mini mice so he can bat those around. But with the very first mouse (there are 5 of them) Robby pulled off a hot pink felt eye, severed a leatherette (suede?) blue tail and munched on the white fur, swallowing some, I am afraid. Also, the other eye is gone and where did that go? For meowing out loud!

So, forget Bar Keepers Friend, what on earth is wrong with Hartz? What kind of toy is this for a cat? Robby even stuck the cheap mouse in his food dish while he was eating it, he loved this mouse so much. But if the mouse lasts a grand total of 3 minutes...the point, please? And it is possibly dangerous, falling apart that quickly. I want a refund. And I was right there supervising, I could barely keep up. You can bet your bottom dollar I took that mouse away once I realized the futility and danger of it. A crummy mouse a cat loves is not a good combination.

Oh, BTW, I don't think the fake furry mouse on the end of the stick, Robby's favorite toy, is a mouse. I've decided it's a muskrat.

I thought I was getting sick today. So I had to take an evening nap. Robby's favorite spot is the down comforter on the floor across the room. Don't ask. Anyway, he was napping, too. When I woke up, I just lay there for a while with my eyes shut. Then I heard it. meow. Very tiny and sweet. And there he was, down by the side of the bed looking up. Smart cat, to wake me up when he felt like it. It AMAZES me how smart an 8 week old kitten can be. He knows where everything is without second guessing. And he has tired of some things that I have tried to discourage, like playing with the wires under the computer desk.

Yes, I am COMPLETELY satisfied with our little Robby. Pets are the best, I'm sure we all agree on that. I love that Adam's job in the garden was to tend animals and plants. Obviously, it doesn't get any better, that was the best, the most perfect time in human history (kinda of easy with only two humans, but we know how that turned out). I think the Amish have it right, only if they would chill a little and use more modern conveniences.

There was one more thing I really wanted to tell you, but it's one of those days and it went bye-bye, too. I think I'll go do my boring back exercises and see if I can get it back, ha, ha.

Loving you all,
KEM

The most delicate sound in the world...a kitten sneeze.

Yes. Robby has a cold. Robby is quickly becoming a people kitty in general and a KEM kitty in particular. The poor little thing slept all day long. No playing or anything. Well, Robby swiped at it's fake fur mouse on a stick for a minute this morning and then that was it. He wakens to stretch or nibble or potty and then right back to sleep. He comes calling for me in his tiny little meow voice that only melts your heart faster than butter.

My friend, the one who sings kitten lullabies so adorably it should be recorded, she sent me a link to a site called catsthatlooklikeHitler. Well. I never. I hate to say it, but a lot of those cats, something like 7,000 of them, have facial markings similar to Robby. None as cute, of course. But I wrote my friend back that I'd rather Robby's photo be displayed on a site called catsthatlooklikeGroucho. Marx, that is.

So, I was looking at the AOL article on 10 great paint colors. Then I read the comments. And in one of the comments, the very first one I believe, the lady says to check out a book called Decluttering Fast (with the idea that painting a room ain't gonna cure the clutter). Something like that. So, it was so easy to click on the link. Testimonials had very favorable things to say about this method of decluttering and how kind and patient and encouraging was the author. But do you want to know something? You have to buy the book online, as in it comes to your computer, it is an e book, is that what you would call it? You cannot buy it in the store. You can print it out from your computer once you buy it, but you cannot give it to anyone. How boring is that?

So, I took the plunge. I am good at taking plunges lately. The lady describes exactly everything I feel about clutter gone wild. The way she put it, I was convicted. Guess I can't tell you too much about it or I might get arrested.

But the first thing they told me to do once I bought the book was to save the access page in my Favorites. You know, so I can have access to the book and read it over and over instead of actually doing what it says. Hello. People. I don't know how to save anything to my Favorites. I called Mike, thankfully for me, his flight was delayed and he could walk me through it. He told me what to do but it didn't work. I felt desperate because I just spent an unreasonable amount of money for this e book and now I'm going to lose it, just watch.

So, I called DTD. DTD asks me to find Favorites. I can do that, I click on it every day for AOL and Living Dust. But how do I add this access page? asks I. She said, Follow what it says. I said, And like how? Well, to make a tedious story tolerable, whatever DTD ended up telling me to do worked better than what Mike told me to do, because I managed to add the page to Favorites. I have no patience with tech things and Mike has no patience with me because of that. He was having me click on the yellow star with the green arrow that was next to and instead of the regular Favorite's yellow star. WHATEVER.

I said, DTD, thank you so much because you are a better helper than Mike. She, as usual, can't believe I don't know how to do such a thing. I proclaim, DTD, someone my age can't do these things. She said, not letting me down, That is pathetic.

Well, today I call Nina. Nina is the Crime Lady. I've told you about her, she's an amputee. Guess what? In the whole state of Florida, Nina's Neighborhood (where I live) got the award as the Number One Crime Watch. Wow. But I was calling Nina because she is In-The-Know. I asked, Nina, do you know of a good camphor tree trimmer?

Did she know of a good camphor tree trimmer. Hardee-har-har, of course she did. I called him immediately and he came over essentially immediately to give me an estimate. He was very reasonable, even though we were standing under a tree with lightning and thunder crashing all around us.

Then I asked, Did you happen to cut the lady's camphor trees up by Grace Lutheran School? He said, Yes, I did. I said, What street (testing him, you know). He said, 43rd Ave. Which was correct.

But let me back up a second. When I walk the neighborhood, I notice the camphor trees. And I'd noticed this lady's trees and thought they looked nice. I was going to leave a note on her door to please call me with the name of her tree trimmer. But I never did that.

So I called Nina, like I just said I did, and her tree man is one and the same who did the other lady's camphors, it turns out. There are only 10 million tree trimmers around St. Pete and all 10 million leave fliers on the door.

And to conclude this fine How Do You Do, I took Jazzi on a spin and I said, Jazz, let's go stare at those lady's camphors. As I was driving up the street I noticed a woman walking her dog near the camphor's house. I stopped and rolled down my window. Do you happen to live in the house with the camphors? Yes, she did. She said he was a fine tree trimmer, because I wanted to know. And we agreed, So what if he looks like the wrestler Hulk Hogan, if he can trim trees. He looks EXACTLY like Hulk Hogan.

Well, that might have been one of those stories only I find interesting, but at least I can be proud that I told it minimally. And nothing more...to be proud of, that is.

I do believe that New Improved Bar Keeper's Friend Liquid smells lemon-y, with a touch ammonia-ny. But quite doable, really, it is. They have done a good job, going from drastically atrocious to quite tolerable, almost pleasant. I commend the fine folk at Bar Keeper's Friend Liquid. A fine product that now smells fine.

Can you believe spellchick has never heard of the word decluttering. Now, THAT is pathetic. No wonder the most of us live in a royal mess.

On the verge, once again,
KEM

Pardon me while I take a cat nap.

Today Jazzi and I bought toys for Robby. The best one is this dangly soft furry thing that's attached to a long string that's attached to a long stick. I hold the stick and Robby jumps and bats at the fur toy (a strange brown mouse, I guess it is). The questionable mouse really swings wildly on that string. One bat of the paw and the fake mouse boomerangs all over the place. Poor Robby was doing belly flops, back flips, flip-flops and back flops. Got that? He didn't seem to mind a bit, even on the unforgiving tile floor, and played with this thing for 10 straight minutes. Which means KEM played with it for 10 straight minutes. Then when Daddy got home, we had to demonstrate and do it all over again. This thingermajigger is called Neko Flies, it's swat cats love! Four cats invented it. And there are interchangeable toy creatures you can buy and clip on, very clever and lucrative. FancyCat magazine, I think is what FancyCat is, gave it a #1 recommendation, and I would have to put in my two cents, Marvelous toy.

I also bought him a bed, a little cloth basket, almost like what you would picture Moses mother made when she set him in the Nile. Only Robby's basket is made of cloth "ropes," for lack of a better word, since I am napping and can't think, and also, it is not pitched over with tar and slime. Also, it is round, for a curly cat. Well, so much for this great analogy. But Robby's basket looks like it would float. It is very deep and, of course, smaller at the bottom and then gradually widening at the top. A bowl, yeah, that's it. Furthermore, it is made in USA, South Carolina, to be exact, and it is handmade and it is supposed to conform to Robby's favorite sleeping positions. You can set it on the dryer, or anywhere else Robby loves to spend time. I did not make that up, that is what the directions say, on the dryer.

Speaking of dryers, when I went to open my dryer door today, while it was still drying, it kept right on drying. Hmm, let's try that sentence again. Speaking of dryers, when I went to open the door in the middle of the cycle, it kept right on tumbling. How'd that happen? Whenever you open the door in mid-cycle, it's supposed to shut off, right? Honestly, I'm at the age and stage where I need to start over. A fresh new house and all fresh new stuff to go in it, to go right along with my fresh new kitten. Out with the old. Ha, ha, don't we all wish. Well, Mike, Jazzi and I would be the only old stuff transferred. And my piano, of course. And my newish washing machine, of course.

At Bible study tonight, which I showed up just in time for the movie part of it, because Jazzi and I were shopping at the pet shop, so I missed the discussion part, which I kind of did on purpose because I didn't fill in the workbook blanks. There are two discussion groups and the group I am not in, they meet right inside the front door. I quietly pushed open the door, kinda sneaky, not wanting to disturb. A lady says, It's not working. Okay, where were we? Afterwards, I talked to this nice lady and her daughter. I barely know them from church. Barely. But the lady has back problems and two major back surgeries in the last year or so. She also has lupus, heart attack, gall bladder out, knee, hip and shoulder surgeries, etc. I remember from a ladies' retreat that she is very witty and funny. Well, we got talking for a half hour. Her DTD was standing right there, too. For some reason, the lady said, You are younger than I am. I said, No, we are the same age, when did you graduate from high school? 1978, says she. Like I said...that's when I graduated. I'm a good guesser. Turns out both our daughters are 19, too. Then we decided we are really different, aside from our ages and our DTD'S ages. She and her DTD are into higher mathematics, and I and my DTD are into little kids. DTD and I are not into higher mathematics and she and her DTD are not into little kids, except her own. But we all do love cats, minus my DTD, unless they are miniature, see the next paragraph. Well, when we left, I was behind her car. I followed her car on my way home, wondering where she would turn off to go to her home. She never turned off, never turned off. Turns out she finally turned off, 6 small blocks from my house. Good grief, we're neighbors.

My own personal DTD stopped by today and asked, Do they make toy cats, that will stay tiny, like toy dogs? Well, don't we all wish.

So, we didn't go see Jinny today. Tomorrow. And I didn't exactly test Bar Keeper's Friend Liquid, either. Tomorrow. But, I noticed the new bottle I bought myself, before all this "atrocious" stuff happened, is identical looking to the three new improved formula bottles they sent me, full-size and all. And now that I think about it, my own bottle, well, I haven't noticed the atrocious smell anymore when I clean my sink. It doesn't reek, really. It just smells...like sensible cleaner. But I will try the company-sent bottles tomorrow and give you a speedy report. Meanwhile, I just breathed deeply into my personal bottle a couple of times, to be sure it doesn't smell its formerly atrocious self. Well, I don't recommend deep breathing it, improved or not. Okay, I'm talking in circles. I am checking out now.

A Few Less Brain Cells Than When I Started This Post,
KEM
Excuse me, but I am back for a second. I just got up to wash dishes, after I pressed PUBLISH POST, and the Calphalon non-stick pan that I made pancakes in and then later, no washy in-between and 12 hours inserted, that kind of later, I made oatmeal in, well, the pan has cooled off and the film of oatmeal that was left and dried is just that, a film. It all came off as in a sheet, like glue or something that dried and you peeled it off. I has the transparency of waxed paper. Plastic is what it is. WEIRD. Is it the oatmeal, the pan...or KEM? Why is this yellow?

Robby and I completed part of our Tour this afternoon. At the first stop, my friend sang kitty lullabies in a very sweet and small kitty voice. Later she said, Robby looks like Groucho Marx. I can kind of see that, if he sported wire rim spectacles and a cigar. My friend said it is his mustache, which is the connected black freckles on the white lip.

This lady has the kitty kat touch. Robby was slung over her arm, his neck flattened, his head dangling, completely hypnotized. We needed a camera, to say the least.

This evening we came home to Robby's very first email, from above mentioned friend, of course. Robby had fun writing back. I also came away with the book A Cat Abroad by Peter Gethers. Can't wait to read that, a national bestseller. Which reminds me, I hope my dad read Dewey, because I can't wait to read that either. Maybe I will read these aloud to Robby. When my friend gets a cat, she's going to name it Rupert. So Roberto and Rupert can have play dates.

The next visit was with the ARA (Advice Ready Alert) lady. She has three indoors cats, so with Robby being so little, we visited outside. She loves black and white cats, so Robby was a big hit. She looked at his white stomach, which I neglected to mention to you a few blogs ago. He has a totally white underside. I learned from this lady that a cat like this is called a Tuxedo cat, what with the white face and paws. However, Robby has a strictly black tail. I also learned valuable information like not to leave the cat in a hot car, not to let it play with plastic bags and not to let Jazzi kill it. I sincerely hope none of these things happens. I appreciate my friends' enthusiasm for my kitty. Such great friends.

My last stop was with my dear friends who are in their early 80's. Here, Robby got down and showed off what a scamper doodle he is...as in all over their house. Boy, Robby is fast. Boy, it wore me out. Robby found every room in their house. Robby got under the middle of their California King size bed, which happened to be situated low to the ground. Then he went under a very low dresser, entering from the rear. I'm telling you, it was a series of heart attacks, including he tried to eat their plant. Leneve wants a kitty but her husband says, No. I called them ahead and said, I am coming over with a surprise. Well, it's true, they could not have a kitten because it would not be good to trip over it and break your hip. Which WOULD happen. Not good at all.

I think I will get a harness and leash for Robby so I can walk him around the neighborhood. I tried carrying him and that was your basically lost cause.

Last night I let Robby run around the bedroom. There is lots for him to do there because it has been over three weeks since we've come home from our vacation, and I still haven't unpacked. There are multiple assorted open bags and suitcases begging a kitty to explore. Once I clean my house, it is going to be a lot more boring for Robby. Anyway, I was reading in bed and I noticed it got quiet, so I got up to look for Robby. I didn't have to look far. There he was, right beside the bed curled up on the edge of a pillowcase, the pillow was propped against the nightstand. Waaah, it was so adorable.

Tomorrow I will take Robby on Tour, Day 2. We will go see Jinny, who started this whole thing. It was because of Jinny that I went to the pet store and first saw Earl Grey. I wish I had Earl Grey to be friends with Robby. Well, I'm not going there.

Jazzi snarled at Robby. I set down on the floor an 8 oz. water bottle, with lid screwed on. Jazzi's favorite and best trick is to unscrew caps from water bottles. This bottle was smaller than the usual 16 oz. size Jazzi is used to. In fact, it was the purrfect size for Robby to investigate, his nose just hit the cap with bottle standing up. Both animals approaced the bottle at the same time. Robby ignored Jazzi and was sniffing around. Jazzi was insulted that Robby would dare to encroach on something that Jazzi considers her exclusive sacred property. So Jazzi snarled at Robby (hence the warning above from friend will be heeded). Mommy was not pleased. It's all a learning process, though. Jazzi is 99.9% most interested in Robby. Robby is not sure what to make of the Jazz. Jazzi even snarls at me if I dare to come near her when she has a special treat. What a little goof.

Good grief, I need to use my Bar Keeper's Friend and blog a report on it. Tomorrow, after The Tour.

KEM'S ZOO

Hello, I am over 2oo days, maybe 300, behind printing out my blogs. I like to print them and then hold all the pages together and pretend it's a book.

Today at church our cat-loving friends, who have 3 cats, all rescues, said we should run out and get another kitten so Robby will have a best bud. Well, wow, I wasn't quite ready to hear that. Jazzi is supposed to be Robby's best bud. Jazzi is doing a good job not being jealous, sweet dog.

Robby minds pretty well. When I say, Robby, do not scratch on the basket. Or, Robby, do not bite the cords, he kind of says, Okay.

Robby loves to curl up on the piano bench or in the small basket on the desk, which is entirely too cute. I had my Sports Illustrated magazines, with blog notes jotted on them, and also my first grade class picture laying on top of this basket. Robby made them slide into the basket, kind of cock-eyed, which leaves a cozy small pocket of a space he barely fits into. He actually curls up right against his mother when she was in first grade. He also likes to chase his tail in a paper shopping bag. He's expert at playing soccer with a straw ball (which then I can never find again). He's smart and doesn't have accidents and he can find his food dish, which I had to move, tucked it in the pantry behind things that Jazzi can't navigate. Robby also enjoys staring at the computer screen. He can read and follows the cursor thingy. He is meowing more, a little pinch of a squeak. And he drapes beautifully over my head, a Cat Hat. Okay, so I'm a new mother, please give me a lot of leash. I'm sure I'll find a new blogging subject in a few weeks. Gosh, his black spotted pink nose is cute.

Okay, I DO love my friends. Oonagh, how's that for a great name, say it like this: Long O, NAY. O-NAY. Her brothers and sisters and children all have fascinating names, too. Well, she emails me today, she knows my BIG birthday is coming up, and her biggy isn't too far beyond mine. She says,

We woman of advanced maternal years must unite in solidarity -- Oonagh

That just busted me up. And it's wisdom in a nutshell. Honestly, what a great quote she summoned.

Have to mention this little boy at Mike's church. He is 3 and a half and is, oh, so funny, he definitely came out on the long end of the personality stick. Every week during the children's sermon, when the kids go up to the front of the church, he raises his hands to make appropriate (hilarious) comments. There is always one child who sets us off, it used to be a blond curly headed little Shirley Temple type. I anticipate the children's sermon now because of this charming boy, you can really count on him. Today the story was knocking on your neighbor's door until he tires of your pestering and hands over the loaf of bread. This was tied into how we can knock on Jesus' door when we need something. The teacher asked the question, What do you think Jesus does when you knock on his door?, what do you do when someone knocks on your door? So, this child shoots up his hand and says in a high-pitched voice, great cadence, You say, COME IN! Of course, you had to hear how he said it, but we all broke up. And it really struck a chord with me. Out of the mouth of babes, because now when I pray I can just hear Jesus welcoming me, with pure delight, sparkly eyes, COME IN!

I guess I was in a tickly mood today because a line in the hymn, What A Friend We Have In Jesus, also got to me. It goes something like this, When our friends despise, forsake us. So much for some friendships, eh?

Tomorrow is the big Robby Tour, I have added a stop, the church cat loving people mentioned above. In fact, one of their cats was an abandoned, or something, church urchin. This lady is now on the ARA, Advice Ready Alert to answer any and all of my cat questions. It's so nice having someone on call, don't you think? After the Toru I have to go to the pet shop and pick up some fun things like a cat bed and a poop scoop. And a springy toy, something that bounces on a string or spring, because Robby has been batting the price tags hanging on my clothes in the closet. And the zipper dangling from my music bag. He needs a scratching post, too. The guy at PetSmart (which I always before thought was PetsMart, not too Smart of me, just like my childhood friend always thought, for umpteen years, that it was MacDonalds instead of McDonalds), the guy said that some cats don't scratch and to wait to see what Robby was before I invested in a scratching post. Robby is a scratcher, of course.

Need to go give a kitty massage and get his motor humming.

Hope your last week of July is grand. LAST WEEK OF JULY?? You do realize that Christmas is precisely 5 months away, don't you? I always find that to be a shocking and totally unbelievable statement, Christmas 5 months away. Who ever heard of such a thing?

Kitty KEM