After last night's horror dinner, which somehow didn't slay us in our bed, tonight I chose a no-fail dinner. Salad. Well, it can fail, but that, friends, takes talent. Yesterday I bought a bag of Organic Baby Spinach Blend. I wound up getting it free because when this store overcharges you, they reimburse you. This works for me because said store is very good at overcharging. I kinda made a little fool of myself in the process, but, oh, well. See, the lady I take to the grocery, we both bought organic bananas. When I reviewed our receipts, I said, HARK!, they charged me $1.99 per pound for bananas and then turned around and charged you $2.65 for bananas, per pound.

Now, all you spiffy blog readers out there, all two of you, are all ready thinking, Who in their right mind would pay $1.99 for bananas, organic notwithstanding? Well, remember, I had no sleep the night before and jumped to bad conclusions, partly because this store's business dealings . . . hmm, I don't like them. And since I was positive they overcharged me for the spinach blend, I marched with purpose over to the service desk. Meanwhile, my friend goes to check the banana prices. A young man accompanies her back to point out that the organic 'nanas are $.99 a pound and that the weight is printed first on the receipt, followed by the price. DUH! So, of course, he was right. But seriously, here is how they print it: BANANAS, ORGANIC; 1.99/lb .99/lb. So, really, I wasn't up to sorting all that, but of course, I should have noticed when I then compared 2.65/lb .99/lb.

Well, tonight when I opened my fresh bag of Organic Baby Spinach Blend, there was plenty of Spinach, but where was the Blend? Oh yeah, there it is, that single little radicchio speck some little field bunny rabbit picked out of his teeth. Eenie, meenie, miney, mo, who gets the blend? Boy, the odds weren't in favor of this particular bag of blend. There was supposed to be arugula in there, too. HA! Don't I know how to pick em?

Today I marched (marchin so makes you feel you are the big bad person ready to shake your life down) upstairs to make sense of all the leftover Christmas boxes and tissue paper and gift bags. I'm beginning to believe leftovers are a thorn in my side. I had collected EVERYONE'S used gift boxes and carted them upstairs, you know, after we opened presents. Looking all those over, I was starting to pray for dents and tears, you know, where the scotch tape ripped off the box. It is not my technique to tape my paper to the box or tape the box shut. But that is some people's technique, bless them.

Then I wrapped some more gifts still to be distributed. I was highly hoping to use up all my nasty cheap wrapping paper. It's just one tube, but it's like the lady in the Bible who was so poor and about to use up all her oil for baking cakes. Until the prophet of God prayed for her and then the oil jar always had some oil in it. I did not pray that this roll of paper would never run out, but that seems to be the case. I tried to use it generously and when I unrolled the tube to see how much might be left, it was simply unbelievable. But, I'VE HAD IT, it's giving me a stroke and it is going to Hospice Thrift Store where it can give someone else a stroke. Ain't I nice?

I am very excited because on Friday, Lord willing, I am getting together with my old new friend. Or maybe she is my new old friend. What this means is that she is really my sister's friend from school days, but I have wormed my little self right into the big picture, starting 14 years ago. However, we never really see each other, except the few times we have. We always say, Oh, we HAVE to get together soon and ALL the time. And then the years roll (good word) by and we play the same little game all over again. But THIS time, we have a serious agenda. She is not old in age, of course, I am older than she is. But she is an old friend because anyone you have known for 40 years can hardly said to be a new friend. Yet, we are new friends . . . again. It's really lots of fun. She's the one who had us over for New Year's, which reminds me, I have to tell you my New Year's stories tomorrow, while the year is still new, not old.

Did you know it's The Big Freeze in Florida? Right along with the rest of the country. Boy, I hope they can this global warming dialogue . . . monologue if you're You Know Who. I never had my hot chocolate last night, I was way too tired, but I am blogging early tonight and I am headed for the cocoa in as along as it takes me to say, Don't get frostbite! Not to mention that I want to use up my old can of cocoa and open the new one. No more old lady cocoa. (Hope I'm not offending any old ladies out there, for heaven's sake, I'm a little old lady. Therefore, no one is entitled to take offense. I am a little old lady, but I behave as though I am NOT.)

KEM, Icewoman (it's true, I wrap my icicle fingers around Mike's throat and he about gags, he asks, How can your body temperature be lower than the air temperature? I reply, I don't know, how do I pick the only bag of blend that has no blend? I pointed that fact out to the saucy young man who directed me to read receipts correctly, This bag of blend has spinach ONLY -- had to divert his attention from my shame . . . Anyway, I am wired to be weird, just ask DTD.)