When You Don't Have a Job

Today after Sunday School a group went out for lunch and I tagged along. We all had plenty to eat. I asked this lady across from me, What do you eat tonight after a big lunch like this? Without hesitation she said, A peanut butter sandwich and milk. And the milk has to be cold (she's famous for knowing her own mind). I thought that was an excellent idea and so excellent in fact that it's just what I had tonight, minus the milk because I'm out. Plus apricot-raspberry preserves. Plus three chocolate chip cookies, I made them last night. For lunch I had fish and chips. For breakfast I had a chocolate chip cookie. Also ccc after Sunday School because I brought them to share. I feel really sick.

For those who don't know it, my husband lost his job going on 19 months ago, not fun for him. The state of the economy has made it very difficult to find employment. Just 10 days ago a dear friend's husband lost his job. I told her, We can take consolation in the fact that millions of people are in the same boast as we. That's really not so cheery, but cheerier than supposing we are THE ONLY ONES. We are not. Still, it's an uncomfortable feeling, to say the least.

So, I tried to say some things that might be helpful, preaching to myself first and foremost.

I am positive that God has these things happen for a purpose, that He will stand out to us as we should perceive Him. I think I even blogged about that a couple of Sundays ago, that he strips us of our earthly joys, pleasures and comforts, so that He will be the absolute source of our joy. I mean, it's true, when we hit rock bottom, He is still there in all His faithfulness, love and glory.

We do what we can do. God will provide for us. We have to exercise our faith and not despair. That scene in Anne of Green Gables (have you all seen that film?, it's the best) really got branded into my mind. Anne was being all dramatic about something, I forget what, she was all down in the dumps. And Marilla, whom Anne live with, said, To despair is to turn our backs on God. Easier said than done. But if we have to go through these trials, we may as well behave NOW as we will wish we'd behaved when God comes through for us, whether that be a better job or just learning the lessons he intends. I mean, I think to myself all the time when I get depressed, Wow, this is not acting in faith. It will feel so silly to smile after God gives me something tangible, when indeed His presence has been with me all along. Have I ever gone hungry? NEVER. Have I ever not had clothing or shelter? NEVER. Has God ever withheld His love and goodness from me? NEVER. All my little attitude of wanting everything "just so" has been humiliated time and again. But still, I feel in my heart I have not fully accepted all that God wants me to learn, REALLY learn. I'm afraid my pride, stubbornness and even anger toward God crop back up and diminish my returns on the lessons God is bringing into my life.

So, I ask God to increase my small faith. I ask that the desires of my heart be for lasting things, for God Himself. I seek forgiveness for becoming impatient and discontent. And whatever God has in store, I truly look forward to it. Let's all remember, the trials of this life are but for a moment compared with the eternal glory that awaits us.

My friend confesses that it is so hard to wait on the Lord, that she hopes He has good in all this. She said, I have seen good come, actually...nothing but the Lord seems good...all other worldly things seem preposterous. One day she was overwhelmed with the emotion of the situation but mainly because, "I knew I needed to trust the Lord completely ... and He is so worthy of my trust."

Hoping in God,
KEM