Tonight while we were scarfing down our hamburgers (why go gourmet when you can be just as happy eating real food?) a big black bomb landed on our dining room table. It came out of absolutely nowhere, I'm telling you, and landed with an earth shattering THUD. Scared us to pieces and we about gagged on our burgers. This bomb had the superlatives of Superman.

So, I guess the moral of this story is Mike and I are losing our peripheral vision. Make that, lost. As you figured, Robby was the big black bomb. Now, I've seen him do this once before, but it's an entirely different matter when it happens when you're not prepared for it. Maybe I told you how Robby can get on the room divider between the kitchen and dining room. The top of it is like a shelf, it's about 3.5 feet from the floor. From this perch, Robby takes his time studying the rather wide distance to the dining room table. It's one giant leap and he puts a lot into it, rocketing through the air and landing with a splash. Let's put it this way, if you want to enter a room discreetly and unnoticed, this would not be the way to do it.

So, not I, and not Mike, saw this coming. We only saw the splash. It was quite incredible. Out of thin air, as they say. Robby is big enough, at 6 months, to make a statement, and, boy, did he. Now you don't see me, NOW you do. I truly wish all of you were eating hamburgers with us tonight, so you could understand how startling it was. I mean, wow, if we had at least seen the last few inches of his flight, but no, just the package dropped out of the blue, only we witnessed none of the drop. This is getting repetitive, in my effort to translate. Moving on...

I'm really craving a big bowl of lumpy Cream of Wheat. But I want to make the most of this extra hour of sleep, too. The theory is, you can have lumpy Cream of Wheat any time. But you only get the extra hour of sleep once a year.

Since I said I am low in Vitamin D, others have said the same. In fact, someone said that a huge number of women are deficient in Vitamin D. Anybody have an explanation for this epidemic?

Oh dear, that marvelous lady horse lost today by a nose. The Breeder's Cup. She had won all 19 of her previous races and was going to break the record today. It would be something because she was racing against the boys today and normally she sticks to her gender. Also, she doesn't race on real dirt, just fake surface, but this was where the Kentucky Derby is held, what's the name of that track? It was so exciting, she was dead last for 4/5ths of the race, I guess that's how she is used to doing things, coming behind from last in dramatic fashion.

And then, rounding the corner to the home stretch, here she comes, breaking through the pack of gentlemen, somehow. Miss Z made it so close it was practically a tie. She just needed two more strides and she would have won. I was so sad. Really, I take things too hard. The jockey was so devastated he couldn't be interviewed afterwards. He had won so many consecutive races with Miss Z. Which made me nervous because how many races can you win in a row, you know? But to lose by a couple inches, you have to wonder what you could have done differently, just one little split second thing. Really, I have no business watching sports. Did anyone else watch this race? Were you sad, too? Anyway, they said Miss Z was the greatest and this race takes nothing away from her, she was awesome and made it thrilling...she certainly did. Miss Z is the most popular horse just about ever, it's like a cult following. We saw a cartoon poster with Mizz Z all decked out in a princess outfit, sitting up, it was hilarious. But this was her last race, boo hoo.

Okay, that was a ramble. I guess I had a boring-ish day. My favorite. Do you know how to spell L-A-Z-Y? That's what CDW always used to ask me. She just told me to go to Germany and not worry about the house, as in cleaning it. Then she suggested it would be nice if Don Aslett himself would come and clean my house. Agreed. You know, a couple of times I have risked all and left town without cleaning my house, you know, hang it all, guess what? Someone asked to spend the night in it. And another time, Mike brought a couple of ladies to see the house, because they had always wanted to see it. Mike got into town before I did and gave them the royal tour. It's a wonder they even speak to me anymore. And the man who wanted to spend the night, we had to cut our vacation short and rush home and I had to clean like a mad woman. And I was, mad in more than one sense of the word.

KEM, the worthless P.S. The horse is named Zenyatta (isn't that pretty, for a horse?). And the rink is Churchill Downs, everyone knows that. (I just played Google.) Off to lump up my Cream of Wheat.