The other day my sister texted me that she had just eaten a black rotten avocado and felt sick, deathly ill, as a matter of fact.

I wondered how this could happen. How do you eat a rotten black avocado?

It happens like this:

You order a sandwich at a well known sandwich restaurant, and it's not Panera Bread.

You eat it while talking to someone, paying not a lick of attention to what you deposit in your mouth.

Until the end...when you glance down. And what greets your innocent eyes but black mushy awfulness oozing from the sandwich.

Upon closer examination, you see what it is and you know what you have done. Your world has just been rocked.

You immediately become sicker than sick and text your sister.

Then you run to the health food store for a remedy. You tell the hilariously fun salesgirl that this wouldn't happen to your sister (KEM) because she carefully examines every forkful. It has to have A+, # UNO rating before the fork slips between the lips.

You live, but you have a VERY BAD memory. And you certainly can't be an improved version of yourself, swallowing such horror.

THE VERY BAD END.

So, wow, that really make my flesh crawl. It just so happens that the night before I had had a perfect avocado, a rare gem of an avocado. So, my sister's story was all the more poignant.

You wanna know something? I can't tell you how many people have made fun of me for checking out my food. Like I think I've told you before, this same sister was laughing me all the way to the Funny Farm while I was picking through a salad once. And then I found a fly, non living, in my salad. Which made her laugh even harder. But this sister is joining the ranks of Looks Before You Swallow. You'd better believe it.

Okay, dear ones, I must shut it down tonight. My eyes are burning due to extra late bedtimes. Today I was going to spend 4 hours sifting through the old newspaper piles in the dining room, but I have completely run out of time, even without going to exercise class. I done give up on exercise class. Cleaning the shower, washing the dog, changing the sheets, doing a load of laundry, taking dog to vet, walking dog, going to grocery store and cooking dinner and doing my chores. Wow, it seemed like so much at the time but on paper it doesn't look so hot. But the truth is driven home, A woman's work is NEVER done. Oh, and I did exercise AT HOME.

I had many things to blog about today, but Pftt!, they have dissipated.

Robby Boots has just come to visit. I hope he doesn't require leg braces. No, he doesn't, I just kid, he is a doll! Did I tell you he jumped into the microwave, which is installed over the stove? When my nephew heard the story of Robby in the Dryer, he said, Be sure you don't let him in the microwave. Now, weeks later, my nephew writes a birthday thank you note. Hi!, he says. I heard you put the cat in the microwave like I told you not to! Haha! Poor cat.

Somebody stop the planet, I'm getting off.

KEM P.S. It is very difficult to eat a hamburger on a hot dog bun. This is why there isn't such an animal as a ham dog.